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i m sorry for your loss.

節哀順變,表示遺憾

 

以下為外國人對這句話的歷史及關係做出的回覆Q&A

 

Q:I find it strange when someone hears about another's dead lover and he says "I'm sorry for your loss". Why would they apologize when they have nothing to do with his or her death? Is there a better expression, something like "Don't feel sad" or "It's something natural"?

 

A:Loss, not lost. ‘Sorry’ here is not an apology, but a sense more closely showing the word’s history and relation to ‘sorrow’: you are saying, “It causes me sorrow to have heard of/to know of your loss”. “Don't feel sad” and “It's natural” could both be taken to be quite offensive. One is telling the bereaved how to deal with their grief (“My dad just died, I'll bloody well feel sad if I want to!), the other is saying that death is a natural part of life—true, but not a very nice or appropriate thing to say to someone in their time of mourning. 

 

A:"I'm sorry" is often not an apology at all in English. It is in some cases an expression of sympathy ("I feel sorry for your loss") and in other cases it may imply the recognition of a less than optimal situation, and in still others it may preface a confrontational rejoinder: "I'm sorry, maybe you didn't hear me clearly. I told you to piss off." 

 

A:This expression is a fairly recent American import.Before then "Deepest sympathy " Or condolences were offered.Modern script writers often forget this and even use it in 19th century dramas on telly.

 

心理學有句話說

對於悲傷得人要給予同理

而不是對他說

加油點

不要難過

或一些讓他無法趕到同理的句子

只會讓對方感到更悲傷

所以只需要短短的幾句話

加上陪伴

才對能讓對方度過傷痛的方法喔

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